We'll be borrowing a few lines from Jay Z. If you're a Jay Z fan, learn something new.
Listened to the songs in Jay Z album – 4:44? Somewhere in the track – Family Feud, these lines should ring a bell
I’m clear why I’m here, how about you?
Ain’t no such thing as an ugly billionaire, I’m cute
It’s funny; sort of a jab at broke boys, but clever enough to keep’em nodding to the mesmerizing beat of the song. We are sure Jay was just having some fun. All rappers tend to boast about their Maybachs and ice, so we won’t overanalyse the lines. But, he was essentially saying that you are at a great disadvantage if you are at or below the poverty line. Girls don’t like ugly guys. Don’t console yourself with “Beauty lies in the eyes of the Beholder”. It doesn’t always. Then having no money coupled with being ugly makes you sorrier. Even you don’t like being dirt broke. What makes you think that that girl doesn’t hate it too?
Studies, and more studies
Okay, let’s get serious. Studies have been conducted on this, as usual. Sociological studies, psychological studies, all that. They may not be a lot, but the results are sound and compelling. The money, the mullah, as we’ve all made memes about, are factors women consider when choosing a partner. Teenagers mysteriously size your wallet up real quick before giving you their numbers or before going to the cinemas with you. Bills may not always be number one on the list, but it’s at the top. In a 1986 study – “human sexual selection” by David Buss and Michael Barnes, women did admit that they considered earning capacity before choosing a dude. A kind, understanding and intelligent person did rank very high, but money was on the list. But that was 1986 right? And even that study was conducted by asking them a straight question – “What do you value most in a potential mate?” Folks don’t always tell the truth. The participants would definitely not want to appear like gold-diggers, even if they were. So, it’s expected that they’d say with a smile – “I love a man who understands me.” But a broke man doesn’t lack understanding now, does he?
And some more studies
Some other studies show that people go for persons who can provide for what they do not have. In sociology, it’s termed the Beauty-Status Exchange. A millionaire marries a charming woman. He keeps her purse fat, she keeps him happy and satisfied. They might even really be in love. But other studies counter this, of course. Many believe the most convincing theory is ‘a good match.’ Yup. You tend to like and want to be with someone who you are compatible with. If you are quiet girl, you do not want to spend the next fifty years of your life with a rough man. A successful woman would naturally want to be with a successful man. Pretty girls like cute boys; they’d fantasize about birthing adorable little twins. What about the ‘phrase ‘good girls like bad boys’? Not to the proponents of this school.
Spanner in the wheel
There’s just one little issue with this school of thought. A lot of women do like and end up with men who are not the best-looking. And that’s normal. Almost all women are in the looking-good business. Makeup, dashing gowns, curly long wigs, skin care treatment evident under an iPhone camera. Women invest time and money in looking good. Men, on the other hand, carry their heads on their shoulders around just like that. The most to be done is a clean haircut once a month or two. Also, statistically, men still earn a little more than women. So, it’s nobody’s fault that men are attracted to stunning women. These ladies are lovely. And there’s nothing exactly fishy in women being attracted to well-to-do men. A good number of men just earn well and often more than them. Moreover, men of a higher class are generally rated as more attractive. He’s looking polished, skin’s smooth, he doesn’t talk too much and he drives a Maybach. Perfect husband material
Despite the controversies in theories, some things are certain. First, a woman often picks and settles with who she likes, ugly or handsome. Getting temporarily swayed by pretty boys and a wad of cash is natural but those temporal emotions do not last. Dating is tough. Marriage is a lot of work. Even friendships go sour. Attraction to beauty will snap under any little pressure. Money will make a failed marriage barely bearable, but the pain is always fresh. Other things must sustain a relationship. If we are therefore talking strictly about pure attraction, that’s just fine.
Second, beyond attraction, where both men are ugly, the financially stable one may have higher chances of dating or getting married to a woman he likes than the struggling gentleman. Same idea applies to where both are handsome. Slightly average on the scale of certainty is that a rich ugly man may beat a broke handsome boy to a lady they’re both after. It’s sensible. Financial stability may be a sign of maturity, readiness of marriage and ability to bear responsibility. People want safety. It’s not a gender issue; it’s human. No man wants to stay broke. The chances of the handsome broke man is where there are clear signs that his penury is temporary. The lady would stick to him where she sees great potentials (yes, women still see this, don’t laugh) and she just really likes him.
Yours in love,